Whose money is it anyway?

It came from your salary, it's in your bank account, so it's your money?

The car, the house, was bought from the money in your bank account that came from your salary, so these are yours too?

So, it's understandable that during a divorce it can feel really hard to 'give away' huge chunks of your hard-earned financial assets to your soon to be former spouse.

The thing is, it wasn't hard earned by you alone. That's what's often missed.

Very often, when the majority of the assets have physically come from one spouse, it's the other who has picked up the majority of the non-paid work that's required, not only to keep the family going but to allow the other spouse to go out and earn to their full potential.

Imagine having to outsource every meal cooked, every load of laundry, every room cleaned, every hour of childcare and the hours of planning and logistics.

As well as paying higher rates for weekend and evening work, covering holidays and taking time off when sick days mean there is no outsourcing available.

In that context, it's easy to see why it's less about who physically brought the asset in, and more about what it took to build a life together.